I am so tired of life.

It’s just been one damn thing after another. First the accident, then my older brother’s car gives out and then I’m driving my dad’s car last night when it dies and won’t restart. I caught the night transit home, but they’re an hour late (the driver got lost.)

Then we got the police report on the accident today. One of the witnesses confirmed I didn’t have my lights on (I have a bit of memory loss surrounding the incident, and in the conditions you wouldn’t necessarily notice if your lights weren’t on — well lit street, good visiblilty, icy road, etc. So I’m not too sure I did have my lights on and I sure as hell have no way of proving it.

On the other hand, the last time I drove at night without my lights on was years ago, and I got a ticket for it. It just doesn’t seem all that likely to me that I would have forgotten. The police cite the fact that my headlight switch was in the off position as evidence — which might make sense, but then they’d also have to contend that I was driving with my parking break on and my engine off. I don’t remember setting the break or shutting the engine off, but I did. Chances are then that I would also have shut the headlights off. It’s part of the shutdown procedure I’ve been following on a regular basis for over two years now. I could have done it in my sleep, and as far as I know, I did.

All of this ignores, of course, the fact that it *was* a well-lit intersection, and my car (while a reasonably subtle shade of blue,) is not actually invisible. The witnesses saw me. The guy who hit me was a whole lot closer. If he didn’t see me, it was because he was blind. Blind people shouldn’t be driving cars.

None of which excuses the fact that he made an illegal left turn (crossing the turn lane) without signalling and failed to yield right of way. Interestingly enough, the police report omits both of these critical facts.

Two more likely theories present themselves:
1) He was looking further down the road and didn’t see me because he wasn’t looking.
2) He saw me, but misjudged the distance between us, and was trying to get across the street before I got to him.

I can’t prove either, but one or the other must have happened, whether I had my lights on or not.

Needless to say, I am meeting with my lawyer to discuss options.

On the positive side, we got the Valiant back (not a thing wrong with it that letting it rest overnight didn’t fix. I don’t pretend to understand it) and Night Transit let me ride for free. Silver lining behind every cloud, but I am still very tired. And sore.