Oh hell, here I go again.

I wasn’t thinking clearly over the summer and my SAP appeal is late and may not be approved because I forgot to ask my doctor to write me a note when I went in to see him earlier this month.

So that sucks.

I’ve been getting more and more emotional for a while now, I was in an apparently moderation-worthy dust-up on classicbattletech (and have voluntarily exiled myself from the site until the matter is resolved, either by a reversal of the Official Warning or by a year going by to clear it,) and I’ve just been getting surlier and surlier since. I can feel myself slipping into a debilitating depression and the thing is that I have no real way to stop myself when something like this happens.

So it’s going to suck to be me, or to be around me, for a while.

I apologise in advance for anything I’m going to say and in retrospect for anything I’ve already said because I just hate myself and the world right now.


5 thoughts on “Oh hell, here I go again.

  1. Jal_Phoenix

    I suffer from depression intermittently. Diet can play a large part in curing it. Look for foods that contain the same chemicals the meds they give you have. Also, regular exercise like bike riding helps. I know how you can get lethargic and lose all energy, but you have to fight it.

    One thing I absolutely do not recommend is St. John’s Wort. I decided to try that because of it’s “mood improving” properties. Right. Not only did it do nothing to improve my moods, once I stopped taking it I got worse! So now I’m in a dispute with Sunbow over it.

    Anyway, do what you have to do to fight it. Spend time outdoors, with friends, working, anything to keep you busy, and don’t dwell on it. Think no further than the immediate moment.

  2. trunthepaige

    Self hate, Assuming you are not a serial killer, that is not a good thing at all. If nothing else someone you do not know finds what you have to say interesting and intelligent. Interesting and intelligent is not at all related to you going through depression.

    Speaking of you being interesting, thank you.

  3. skiltao

    Was that the “vs” thread? I didn’t read it until today, and man, I was already skipping the 40k posts by page 3… It’s a shame BTechUnits isn’t up; I dunno where exiles and refugees go anymore.

    Also: can’t say much for surliness, but I’ve found those things Jal recommended to be useful most anytime. Never underestimate the power of sunshine and just plain doin’ stuff.

  4. BobRichter

    I live in a desert (okay, fine, a semi-arid shrub steppe.) We get plenty of sunshine, and it’s not exactly like I haven’t been keeping busy.

    And amazingly no. That was the one that surprised me. It was actually the “popular ‘Mechs you don’t get” thread. I fully expected the versus thread to draw some attention.


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